My former wife thinks everything happens for a reason, and that we’re put in situations meant to test us. If we learn from the situation, we graduate beyond it. If we don’t learn, we repeat the situation until we get it.
A more plausible explanation is that we get stuck repeating negative patterns and getting shitty results. If we’re introspective enough to realize there’s a negative pattern, and then we’re creative enough to figure out how to stop the pattern, and then we’re strong enough to implement our solution, we can grow and move on.
The resources we draw on to notice, create, implement and grow are by definition the ones we happen to have around us. So in retrospect it seems like those were the perfect resources we needed at exactly the right time to solve the issues we faced.
That’s like a puddle thinking a divot in the road was made for it because the puddle fits perfectly inside it.
Regardless of whether the lessons are designed or just discovered, to a introspective person living consciously, life feels like a series of lessons that were put here specifically for us to overcome.
The most powerful lesson I learned during my time with Steph was how to create my reality.
Steph is a woman who creates what she wants.
The agents never sold those novels. Undeterred, she decided to earn her second Master’s degree, this time a terminal degree: Master of Fine Arts in Creative Writing. She wrote a third book during that time, followed by dozens of others, then founded her own publishing company.
When Steph decides something will happen, you can bet your ass that thing will happen. I always admired that about her.
I needed to see that because when I met Steph I had huge energy but zero focus. My hard drive is a wasteland of unfinished paintings from years ago. I have lost count of the websites I’ve started and never finished.
I needed a role model who could set her iron will to make something true, and then forge that truth from the fire of her life, come hell or high water.
I think that’s what it takes to live a courageous, satisfying life. Without her I would be jerking off to fantasies of accomplishment, unable to maintain focus or optimism long enough to produce anything of value.
After watching her for eight years (and 12 days), I get it now. You just do it. You decide what’s going to happen, and that becomes your reality.
You don’t expect help, you don’t expect pats on the back, you just slap the shit out of the reality until falls to its knees and begs to conform to your exacting standards.
I know this now, and I do it. I have built businesses, I have forged careers, I have created value, and I’ve done it with the focus and fire that I gained by being around Steph.
So, thank you Steph, I know you’ll rock the world.
Boy, and in a time when guys who have something to say like to bitch about their former wives and stick it to them, I admire a guy who can not only be civil, but be honest about what he has admired about her. I’ve got a lot of respect for you, even if everybody can’t understand it.
That said, she’s right (and so are you): too many people resolve themselves to living a life that is crafted for them, instead of one that they work to create. We all should learn this!
Tom Meitner´s last [type] ..Struggling to Get Healthy
I think it’s easy to indulge our childish impulses when feelings run high, but it’s SO MUCH better to keep perspective, and remember the important things like people and love.
inspiring farewell~
wow..so wise for someone so young (in comparision too me) . I think you have a good handle on reality..the first step in creating a successful life. You inspire me to be a better me.
I can’t ask for than that Mary, I’m glad to be of service 8)
I think most wives would love to have their husbands write a tribute like this to them – never mind an ex!
Your ex is a lucky lady.
Pete,
Sorry for your loss.
It would appear that as strong as she was on determination, her ability to compromise was less developed.
Hopefully that’s a take away for her.
Jay
[...] I Create My Reality, Thank You Steph “• If something goes wrong you don’t even blink. You just forge ahead. • If your first strategy fails, you try 100 more. • If you feel tired, shut the fuck up, no you don’t. • If someone tells you you can’t do it, they stop existing to you. You don’t expect help, you don’t expect pats on the back, you just slap the shit out of the reality until falls to its knees and begs to conform to your exacting standards.” ~Peter Michaud [...]
[...] Despite that, I showed up and you saw my essays every day you were supposed to. I think that’s a good example of what I mean when I tell you to show up no matter what. [...]
I think I get it now :) Love both of you guys very much!
I’m dealing with your position when you were a younger youngun and adding people into my life that keep me FOCUSED.
Come visit!
I think I get it now :) Love both of you guys very much!
I’m dealing with your position when you were a younger youngun and adding people into my life that keep me FOCUSED.
Jay, I don’t know if you know Pete personally, but your comment is presumptuous.
Come visit!
Very awesome to hear from you Monique! I so want to visit. I have to get my house in order first though. Actually your message came at the perfect time for me to reread this one. I’m kind of right sometimes. 8)
Pete´s last [type] ..Sick and Tired